FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
This house was built for laser tag.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
