youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
