I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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