Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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