8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
