Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
