the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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