The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
