i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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