one two three fourrrrnication!
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
