You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Randomize
