I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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