and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
