Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
My apartment stinks of burning failure
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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