with your own penis?
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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