If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It's shark week go big or go home
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
