No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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