i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
