You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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