.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
