By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Randomize