dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
