Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
