he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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