i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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