Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Randomize
