Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
