Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
