Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize