maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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