fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Randomize
