i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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