it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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