you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
