I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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