You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
