We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
