Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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