didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
