I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Watching her eat just hurts me
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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