I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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