How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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