im gay
i know
yea but for you.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just gargled with NyQuil
So vagazzling was a success
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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