i just had sex bonerless
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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