oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
