oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
