oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
