toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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