she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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