Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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