I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
We're too hungover to prance.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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